THE MANILA TIMES
Business Times p.B3
Thursday, August 10, 2006
LEARNING & INNOVATION
By Moje Ramos-Aquino, FPM
Rain, rain, please stay
THANK God for the continuous downpour that is cooling the air especially at night. My trees are also looking fresh and the jackfruit tastes even sweeter.
The downside is that the pitter-patter of rain and the cool air is always making me drowsy and lazy. Rather than miss a column, let’s have some laughs from favorite misquotes of Mary Rau-Foster.
“I have opinions of my own—strong opinions—but I don’t always agree with them.” —Political Leader
“Not only is he ambidextrous but he can throw with either hand.”—Football coach and sports analyst
“We’ve got to pause and ask ourselves: How much clean air do we need?”—Former CEO of carmaker
“Please provide the date of your death.”—From an Internal Revenue Service letter
“I was provided with additional input that was radically different from the truth. I assisted in furthering that version.”—Military officer in hot water
“Fiction writing is great. You can make up almost anything.” —One time novelist
“The road of good intentions is paved with Hell.”—An optimistic person
“A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.”—A philosopher
“A verbal contract isn’t worth the paper it’s written on.”—A brilliant lawyer
“Antidotes are what you take to prevent dotes.”—An aspiring doctor
“Caution: Cape does not enable user to fly.”—Batman Costume warning label
You can subscribe to Mary’s essays for free weekly e-mails at http:/ www.workplaceissues.com/mmmotivator.htm every Monday. These essays are also good for your bulletin boards. Mary’s book Motivating Moments is a guaranteed morale booster, as well as thought provoking and inspirational.
And more misquotes from http://darrel.knutson.com/jokes/quotes/misquotes.html.
“Computers in the future may weigh no more than 1.5 tons.”—Popular Mechanics, forecasting the relentless march of science, 1949
“I think there is a world market for maybe five computers.” —Thomas Watson, chairman of IBM, 1943
“I have traveled the length and breadth of this country and talked with the best people, and I can assure you that data processing is a fad that won’t last out the year.”—The editor in charge of business books for Prentice Hall, 1957
“But what . . . is it good for?” —Engineer at the Advanced Computing Systems Division of IBM, 1968, commenting on the microchip.
“There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home.”—Ken Olson, president, chairman and founder of Digital Equipment Corp., 1977
“This ‘telephone’ has too many shortcomings to be seriously considered a means of communication. The device is inherently of no value to us.”—Western Union internal memo, 1876.
“The wireless music box has no imaginable commercial value. Who would pay for a message sent to nobody in particular?”—David Sarnoff’s associates in response to his urgings for investment in the radio in the 1920s.
“The concept is interesting and well-formed, but in order to earn better than a ‘C,’ the idea must be feasible.”—A Yale University management professor in response to Fred Smith’s paper proposing reliable overnight delivery service.
“Who the hell wants to hear actors talk?”—H.M. Warner, Warner Brothers, 1927.
“I’m just glad it’ll be Clark Gable who’s falling on his face and not Gary Cooper.”—Gary Cooper on his decision not to take the leading role in Gone With The Wind.
“A cookie store is a bad idea. Besides, the market research reports say America likes crispy cookies, not soft and chewy cookies like you make.”—Response to Debbi Fields’ idea of starting Mrs. Fields’ Cookies.
“We don’t like their sound, and guitar music is on the way out.”—Decca Recording Co. rejecting the Beatles, 1962.
“Heavier-than-air flying machines are impossible.”—Lord Kelvin, president, Royal Society, 1895.
Moje consults on human resource and organization development and could be reached at email@example.com.